OK, so I've never jumped on The Bachelor/Bachelorette bandwagon before. To me, the whole concept has always just sounded stupid. However, the new "Bachelorette" seems to be on everyone's minds these days. Because I kept hearing about the show, I decided to try watching the new season. After all, Lee has class on Monday nights, so I'm pretty bored at home! After watching a couple of episodes, I realized I was completely right in my first general assessment of the TV hit...it's ridiculous. But why write a blog-post on it? There are certainly a lot of ridiculous shows out there...why harp on this one? What disturbs me about this particular show is that it is marketed as a reality show, but it is so far from reality, it's not even funny. I realize that there are probably a TON of young girls watching this show, envying Ali, and wishing with all of their might that they could be in her shoes. Let me tear down the facade for you...
I know that this show can be a huge blow to girls' self esteem, as they see this beautiful girl with 2o cute and successful young men all drooling over her. While this girl on TV has a whole roomful of men falling all over her and competing just to talk to her, you're sitting at home wondering why you've never even had one guy fight for you. Why can't you get this kind of attention from guys? You think that if only you looked like Ali, things would be so much better for you (remember that she has top stylists, hair-dressers, and make-up artists at her disposal!).
Do you see the danger here? Girls already suffer from low self-worth, and this show offers an extremely unrealistic picture of love that makes them feel like losers in comparison. In reality, no girl is going to have 20 men meet her and immediately fall for her and start fighting over her. I 100% guarantee to you that no girl would get this kind of immediate attention from this many guys at the same time. In reality, these guys don't know her at all. They have no idea if they would be interested in her in any other setting. Because they're on "The Bachelorette," which is a competition for one girl, they automatically want to win her over.
Another problem with this show, is that it celebrates impurity. Ali makes out with almost all of these guys on her first date with them. Keep in mind that she is dating them all at the same time. Like, she's making out with one guy one night, and another guy the next, etc. She even kisses guys while the other contestants are watching! I'm guessing things get more intimate and racy as the show progresses. All the while, she is never portrayed as inappropriate, easy, or a player. The other guys look on jealously, but have no problem with the fact that they are just one of her many boyfriends. This is completely unrealistic. In absolutely no other context would this kind of behavior be socially acceptable. Someone who is dating and making out with this many guys at the same time would be looked down upon in any other setting. This show makes her behavior acceptable, when it is in reality extremely inappropriate and gross. Furthermore, no guy would just passively watch his girlfriend get it on with other guys, and then continue to pursue her as if nothing happened.
A third problem with this show, is that it paints an unrealistic picture of finding your husband and falling in love. You will never be given a room full of 20 eligible bachelors who are all crazy about you, and be able to simply choose which one you want to marry. I know so many amazing and beautiful girls who are dying to get married but are still single. In reality, finding your husband takes a lot of patience, waiting, and praying. We have to wait for years for God to lead us to the right man...we will never just get to pick him from a crowd of suitors.
The dates that Ali goes on with these men are elaborate, expensive, flashy, and romantic. It's impossible not to feel romance and "love" when you're traveling the world, going on helicopter rides over scenic views, slow dancing at your own private concerts, etc. You will never go on dates like this in real life (unless you're dating a millionaire). It's just not reality. These elaborate dates are designed to stir up romantic feelings...making falling in love look simple.
The fact that these seasons usually end with a marriage proposal seems absurd to me. Before that proposal happens, you need to make sure you know that person extremely well. You can only get to know someone that well by spending time with them. If you are a Christian and don't believe in divorce, you know that getting engaged is not something you should take lightly. To have your whole dating relationship on camera, is completely ridiculous. There is no way in the world you can really get to know someone on the level you need to before engagement, when your relationship has been filmed constantly. Whether they mean to or not, people act differently on camera. Engagement appears so easy on this show, but in reality, it should be a long and careful journey of building a solid relationship while seeking God's guidance the whole time.
So this is my take on the ever popular show, "The Bachelorette." I think this show is disturbing for young girls, because it gives them a false picture of love and dating. It is portrayed as a reality show, but it is completely unrealistic. Because of this, I think it can be dangerous for girls to watch. Sorry to all of you "Bachelorette" fans, but I had to say it...
